Don't Say I Didn't Warn You
by HappyValentina
Summary: Puck's cousin shows up at McKinley, and to everyone's shock, he displays interest in someone unexpected. Klaine, Klaine/Puck friendship. Rated T for some language.


_So this fic was prompted by three things:_

_**One**, obviously, was the announcement of the role that Glee Project winner, Sam Larsen, would be playing in the show. So far it's very vague. 'A relative of Puck'. This is what came to mind._

_**Two**, the general consensus that Noah Puckerman is a bigger Klainer than even Klaine themselves. I firmly believe that, since the days of throwing him in dumpsters and giving him swirlies, Puck has actually developed a sort of big brother protectiveness toward Kurt, judging from "Don't push me, Karofsky. You forced my boy Kurt out of here, and juvie or no, you're already number one on my list to go all Death Star on", or "Seriously, we can, like, form a perimeter around you, like the Secret Service", or "You have no idea how hard it was for me not to jump into that beat down",_

_or "What you're doing is not right. They've both got boyfriends", or THE FACE, that face, that utterly dopey, heart-shaped-bubbles-floating-around face that he gets when either Kurt or both Kurt and Blaine sing. _

_And **three**, that interview with Chris, Jane and Matthew,in which Chris mentions the Sebastian situation that wedges between Kurt and Blaine. "At first I didn't like it, because I thought 'why does no one love me?'" Awww, poor Kurt. Since Karofsky's feelings have yet to be confirmed in the series, yes, indeed it does seem like everyone's just trying to sabotage him, and no one besides Blaine loves him. _

_So this is a little love for Kurt (or rather blatant pursuit), and a little Pucklaine, and a little Sam Larsen's mystery relative for all of you, and for my own indulgence. _

_Disclaimer: Glee belongs to RIB, the writers, and FOX. I only own the new character._

* * *

><p><span>Don't say I didn't warn you<span>

-by HappyValentina

"Hey, jockstrap."

Puck tensed, hand frozen on the dial of his locker, the hairs on the back of his head prickling. There was only one person who referred to him like that.

"Hey, Jared," he mumbled without turning around. The acrid smell of cigarette smoke and cheap cologne preceded the cool glide of a tall figure into his line of vision.

"Whoa, don't sound so enthusiastic. I know you've missed me, but chill, your affection is embarrassing," the other boy said sarcastically. He was in his late teens, all long limbs and intense eyes. His dark brown hair was still in dreadlocks. He and Puck had the same eye color.

Puck glared at his cousin. "What are you doing here? I thought you were touring with your band."

Jared ignored the tone in Puck's voice. "Aw man, touring was awesome, but we decided to each go and explore different paths of life in music."

"You mean, you disintegrated."

"Call it whatever you like."

"So what are you doing here?" Puck asked, as he took a few books from his locker.

"Well, my mom wants me to get a 'real job' or enroll in college, you know, 'make something of myself' and be done with the whole 'rockstar thing'," Jared made quotation marks with his fingers. "And I guess I might as well give it a shot, at least to get her off my back."

"Great," Puck said, unamused.

"Maybe I could start a new band. Maybe you could join."

"No, thanks. If I'm gonna be in a band, I'll be the leader."

"I understand," Jared said.

Puck shut his locker. "So if you're supposed to be looking for a job, what are you doing at my school?"

Jared swung a wiry arm around Puck's neck. "I missed you, you're my favorite cousin," he said.

"I'm your only cousin," Puck replied, wiggling out of his grip.

"I wanted to see how you're doing, see how high school's treating you, the kind of environment here."

"You're here to test your luck with high school chicks."

"Hey, chicks dig this. I've got the rockstar look," Jared shrugged.

"You also look like a pothead."

Jared acted like he was mildly offended. "Whoa, this is a lot of attitude coming from you, and I don't get it. You and I used to do everything together. What's changed?"

Puck rolled his eyes again. "Listen, it's nice to see you again, but I've got class," he said, turning away. Jared caught up, much to Puck's chagrin.

"Whoa, hey, don't be sour. I was hoping to catch up with you. What's new? I heard you got arrested last year and sent to juvie. I'm impressed; even I haven't done that."

"That's because when _you_ got arrested, you didn't qualify for juvie anymore. And I still can't believe you escaped jail."

"I can be very persuasive. It's only one of my skills."

"Fantastic."

"I also heard you had a baby."

Puck merely huffed. "Yeah, I don't want to talk about that."

Jared waved his hands. "Oh, I totally get it. That's nasty business. If it were me, I wouldn't want to know _anything_ about it either."

Puck shot him the dirtiest look ever, but Jared seemed not to notice.

"So what do you do, other than go to class and play football?"

Puck wanted to tell him to go away, but he'd just feel guilty. Jared was just a loser who knew no better than being a self-absorbed nitwit. He probably wouldn't get why Puck really hated his guts right now. So instead, he just rolled with it. "Well, I'm in Glee club."

Jared chuckle. "Glee club? Isn't that, like, the lamest club you can join? Full of losers and geeks? I thought you'd be the one who gave them wedgies and stuff."

Puck shrugged. "Well, not anymore."

Jared slowed down. "Whoa, are you serious? You're there voluntarily? You're one of the losers?"

Puck did his best not to retort. Jared just shook his head and made a snorting sound.

"Whoa, I go away for a year and you're become a completely different person."

"And you're still the same," Puck murmured. Jared had stopped talking, but he was still walking behind Puck. "What, are you really gonna follow me to class?" Puck asked.

Jared made a bored face. "Hey, it beats looking for a job. It's not like I'm qualified for anything."

Puck shook his head in disbelief. He wondered how he ever thought this guy was cool. He was just a pretentious hippie. Puck hoped Jared would remember that school bored him to death, and leave. But Jared continued to follow Puck, yammering about the glorious life of a rock-star on the road.

People looked at Jared as they passed, whether strangely or in admiration or even a bit of fear; the same way they used to look at Puck. They got out of his way. Puck suddenly thought they were insane.

"Hello, Noah. Who's this?" Rachel asked, appearing suddenly.

"Uh, this is Jared, my cousin. Jared, this is Rachel Berry."

"Oh, the jewish princess," Jared said, shaking Rachel's hand. Rachel beamed at him.

"Why thank you," Rachel said bashfully.

"Noah's words, not mine," Jared said with a wink. Rachel giggled. Puck looked at her like she had lost it. Seriously, that was all it took?

She started talking about something in her fast, excited tone as always; Puck wasn't really paying attention. He noticed that Jared was also distracted, looking over her head around the population in the hallway, as if scoping out the panorama, and Puck was a little annoyed. Typical Jared, looking for tail.

"So... see you in Glee club?"

Puck stopped glaring at Jared long enough to realize that Rachel had stopped talking.

"Sure, Rachel, see you then."

She flashed a smile at Jared. They both watched her go.

"She's cute," Jared piped up. Puck raised an eyebrow, like a warning look.

"Yeah, don't get your hopes up, she's taken," he said, as he started on his way again.

"Oh, no, not really my type. She talks too much," Jared said.

The scene was practically repeated verbatim when they came across Santana and Brittany. They wanted to know who the new guy was. Jared only spoke a few words and they were gushing and giggling embarrassingly. But he seemed disinterested. Puck kind of hated him even more because of that.

"See you in Glee club, Puckerman," Santana said. "Bye, Jared," she added flirtatiously.

"There are hotties in the Glee club, unbelievable. I now know why you joined, eh, Noah?" Jared said, elbowing him, and Puck rolled his eyes. He ignored Artie as he passed by; he pretended not to see Finn. All he was thinking was how to get rid of Jared. Puck started praying that they wouldn't run into Lauren or Quinn. That would be too much for him.

"So have you slept with any of them yet?" Jared asked.

Puck willed himself to not say anything, when Blaine and Kurt walked by and waved at him.

"Hey, Noah."

"Hey, Noah."

"Hey, boys," Puck replied, nonchalant, and they walked past.

"Whoa!" Jared suddenly exclaimed, turning around with a sweeping motion, eyes fixated on the boys. He tugged at Puck's arm. "You're not gonna introduce us?"

"Huh?" Puck looked utterly confused for a second, and Jared looked expectant. Blaine and Kurt turned slowly as they realized Jared was referring to them.

"Oh... uh," Puck said hesitantly, still not grasping the expression on Jared's face. "Uh, Jared, these are Hummel and Anderson. Klaine boys, this is my cousin Jared."

"Hi, nice to meet you," Kurt said politely, as he and Blaine took turns shaking Jared's hand.

"Yeah, very nice," Jared said, smiling.

For a moment, Puck thought that Jared held on to Kurt's hand too long. Or that he looked at him too long. Or that his smile was turning sly.

He knew that look.

His eyes went wide.

"Um, I'll see you guys later," Puck said quickly, tugging Jared along by the shirt; however, Jared's head was still facing Kurt as Puck dragged him off, as if he couldn't look away.

"Sure, see you in Glee club," Kurt said, looking slightly puzzled.

"Bye," Blaine added, and they headed off down the hallway together.

"Ah, so Hummel is also in Glee club?" Jared asked. Puck let go of his shirt and stood in front of him.

"What are you doing?" he asked. Jared's eyes shifted comically.

"Uh, meeting your friends?" he answered simply. Puck blinked, still confused by Jared's expression.

"Are you- What's going on?" he sputtered.

"What?" Jared shrugged.

There was a half a second, in which Puck thought Jared was joking or otherwise just being weird, but something about the seriousness with which he was being not serious bugged him. Still, Puck probably didn't really want to know.

"Uh, nothing..." he said finally, dismissively, and shook his head to clear it, and continued on his way, purposely ignoring the way that Jared glanced back a few times as he followed.

* * *

><p>"Jared, what are you <em>still<em> doing here?"

Puck had entered the choir room, only to find Jared lounging in the back, with his arms casually behind his head, balancing his chair on its back legs. Artie, Tina and Mike were talking among themselves, but once or twice they glanced at Jared in confusion.

Jared shrugged. "I've just been having a look around."

After following Puck to Calculus earlier, and sitting idly at the back of the classroom, pretending not to notice the way some girls were looking at him, Jared had disappeared when the bell rang, and Puck had hoped that he had gone home or just away.

"What are you doing in the choir room?"

"I thought I'd hang out. You've been avoiding me all day."

"I've been in class, and you're shouldn't even be here. I thought you left. Aren't you supposed to be looking for a job?"

"I'll get to that. Give me a break, I just got back into town."

Just then, Blaine and Kurt walked in, hand in hand.

"Hey, guys," they said almost in unison.

"Well, hello there," Jared greeted. Sugar giggled.

"Hi, Jared," Santana purred as she and Brittany came in, but Jared's eyes and smile were fixed on Kurt. Kurt and Blaine took their usual seats in the back, and glanced over at Puck questioningly, but Puck was pretending not to know Jared.

The rest of the Glee club filed in promptly, and Puck had an idea.

"I get the feeling Mr. Schue isn't gonna like you just hanging out in here if you're not part of the Glee club," he said, ignoring the fact that he just sounded a lot like Rachel.

"Since when are you such a good boy?" Jared teased. Puck glared.

"I'm just saying," he started. "I take Glee club seriously, and if Mr. Schue tells you to beat it, I'm not gonna defend you."

"What's he gonna do, tell the principal? Give me detention? I don't go here." He grinned. "But I can sing."

"Please don't. Please just leave."

"Why are you acting so uptight? I just want to hang out, that's all."

"Yeah right." Puck snorted, noticing that Jared barely looked away from Kurt even as he spoke. Neither even noticed that Mr. Schue had walked in and was already talking.

"Yeah, you're right. Who am I kidding? Clearly not you," Jared chuckled.

"I don't even know exactly what's going on," Puck shook his head.

Jared gave a quiet mirthful laugh and nudged Puck with his elbow. "You'll see," he said, and glanced one last time at Kurt, before stretching out exaggeratedly and noisily, interrupting Mr. Schue. Everyone turned to him, and Puck might have gone a little red with embarrassment. Typical Jared, always trying to be the center of attention.

"Excuse me, can I help you?" Mr. Schue asked.

"Oh don't mind me, I'm just here to watch," Jared apologized coolly, sliding past Puck to the chair on the other side. "I'm Jared, I'm Noah's cousin, and he graciously invited me to be a spectator. I've been meaning to visit him and see what he's been up to. I just got back into town, I was touring with my band for the past year." He looked at the girls purposely. "I'm the lead guitarist," he said with a smirk, and Tina whispered something to Mercedes, while Mike and Sam looked a little irked. "Anyway, Noah's been telling me about the Glee club and how good you guys are, and I just had to see it for myself," Jared added. Puck frowned.

"That's great," Mr. Schue said graciously. "Well, welcome. It's nice to have a musician in our midst."

Puck slapped his own forehead.

"Thank you. It's always nice to meet talented people, and you always learn something new," Jared replied with fake humility.

"That's true. I just hope you don't plan on stealing one of my students for your band," Mr. Schue joked.

Jared's eyes flickered momentarily to the pale boy to his left. "Well, sometimes that can't be helped, if there's someone talented and eager enough," he wiggled his eyebrows. Puck suddenly wanted to hurl.

Mr. Schue started talking again, and Puck was about to pull Jared down so he'd stop making a spectacle of himself, but Jared had shuffled over and dropped down on the chair right next to Kurt. Kurt jumped at the sudden nearness of this strange boy, and leaned away slightly.

"Hey there again," Jared said in a deep voice. Puck groaned.

"Uh, hi," Kurt replied, looking a little put-off.

Up ahead, Santana, Brittany and Sugar got up and were talking about this number they had prepared. Puck was busy trying to hear what Jared was saying.

"So... do I get to hear you sing today?" Jared was saying. Kurt looked confused.

"What?"

"You know, I'm a musician, and I have an eye for talent. I can tell that _you_," he pointed a finger at Kurt and winked, "are really good at anything you set out to do."

Kurt looked positively dumbfounded. "Uh, thanks... that's... nice..."

"Would you like me to play something for you? I feel very inspired right now."

"I'm okay, thanks," Kurt replied, slipping his hand into Blaine's, who was clearly trying not to laugh.

Even as he got ignored, Jared stared unabashedly at Kurt, who kept leaning away into Blaine, but that didn't seem to deter Jared at the least. Puck was so disgusted that he could barely pay attention to the song, and the rather racy dance that accompanied it.

It was forty five minutes of Puck wanting to knee Jared in the stomach for being an obnoxious douchebag. Jared kept shooting weird, suggestive looks at Kurt, and Puck wondered why Kurt didn't call him out on it. Kurt was never so restrained. Usually when something or someone bothered him, he'd bitch about it; now, whether it was for Blaine's sake or whatever, he was holding back.

But that didn't mean that Puck had to.

"Okay, what the hell, Jared!" Puck demanded, when the bell rang and everyone left the choir room, and just before Jared could sneak away after Kurt.

"What?" Jared said, and either he was genuinely unaware or he just acted like it.

"You're hitting on Hummel?" Puck hissed, in case someone lingered outside the door. Jared snorted.

"No!"

"'No' as in 'yes'?" Puck said knowingly.

Jared grinned mischievously. "Maybe."

"Holy crap," Puck looked slightly horrified.

"What?"

"You realize he's a guy, right?"

"So?"

Puck started fumbling for sense. "I'm- okay, I'm gonna-"

"So is the other one his boyfriend or what?" Jared asked nonchalantly.

"I can't believe I'm having this conversation," Puck said flatly.

"It's okay, you don't have to," Jared waved a hand. Puck took a deep breath.

"Look, I don't care if you like chicks or dudes or both, it's none of my business. Just... lay off Kurt, okay?"

Immediately, Jared's face transformed. He didn't look disappointed or hurt, he looked displeased. "Why?"

"What do you mean 'why'?"

"Does it bother you?"

"Hey, I didn't think you were into dudes, you never told me. But I guess that's fine. Just not Kurt."

"Why not?" Jared asked again. No, demanded.

Puck rolled his eyes. "Because he's got a boyfriend."

"That doesn't mean that I shouldn't go for it," Jared shrugged.

"That's exactly what it means, actually."

"Hey, I'm just swooping in to see if I have a shot, possibly, you know..." Jared shrugged again. He did that a lot, Puck suddenly noticed, and it annoyed him.

"I really can't have this conversation right now," Puck said.

"Hey, you started it," Jared said, and left, as if that had been the end of the conversation. Puck puffed and tried to contain the urge to run after his cousin and knee him in the stomach once and for all.

The truth was that, he didn't quite know why this bothered him so much, but it did. And he had a feeling it wasn't quite over.

* * *

><p>Puck honestly didn't think Kurt was the kind of guy who would cheat; he seemed too proper and nice and he was too happy with Blaine.<p>

But he once had his doubts about it, him and the whole Glee club, back when they had been convinced that Sam and Kurt and Quinn were sneaking around behind everyone's backs. It had just been a huge, terrible misunderstanding, but if _everyone_ had thought it, then something had been seriously off.

And if every girl on school seemed to go for someone like Jared, and Jared was so blatantly putting the moves on Kurt, who was he to say that Kurt wouldn't fall for that too?

Which is why Puck felt the right thing to do was to try to sort it out some other way, before something bad happened.

"Hey, Anderson, I need to talk to you."

Blaine looked up from his locker dial, a little surprised. It wasn't every day that badass football jock Noah Puckerman would talk to the nerdy gay new kid. This was a rare event.

"Hey, Noah. Sure, what's up?"

"You remember my cousin Jared, right?" Puck asked. Blaine nodded, giving him a funny look.

"Well, he's kind of hard to forget."

"I don't know if you noticed yesterday, but he's- how do I say this without freaking myself out?- he seems to be into your boyfriend," Puck said casually.

Blaine chuckled. "Yeah, again, it's kind of hard not to notice."

"Wait, you know?" Puck frowned.

"Uh, he wasn't exactly subtle."

"I mean, you know and you're cool with it?"

The shorter boy shrugged. "I wouldn't say I'm cool, but as long as he's not inappropriate, I guess it's not something to get worked up over. Kurt would've told me if he felt uncomfortable."

Puck huffed. "Well, he seemed uncomfortable yesterday."

Blaine shrugged. "Maybe he didn't want to say anything because he's your cousin. That's partly the reason I didn't say anything either."

"That, or you're completely incapable of being rude to someone, even if they really deserve it," Puck sighed loudly and shook his head. "And I think it's rubbing off on Kurt."

Blaine cocked an eyebrow. "Are you worried about something?"

Puck thought for a moment about what to say, how to put it. "It's just, he's a womanizer, you know?"

"Great, I'm sure Kurt would love to hear _that,_" Blaine said sarcastically. Puck shook his head.

"You know what I mean; I don't know the correct term in this case. He chases after girls, as far as I knew it was _only_ girls. Now he's putting the moves on a guy, and as you said, not very subtly."

"What's your point?"

"I didn't even know he was gay!" Puck hissed. "I was under the impression that he was a bigger man-whore than me. He used to hook up with every chick we met."

"Then maybe he's bisexual."

"Is that even a real thing?" Puck made a face.

"Yes, it is," Blaine said, a little annoyed.

"Look, I just don't want my cousin to come and try to break you guys up, I would feel awful. I used to do that; he actually taught me everything I know about that. But _he_ still does it. He doesn't care about anything, just hooking up."

Blaine gave him a lopsided smile. "Wow, Noah, thanks, but don't worry. I'm not concerned."

"Really?" Puck looked dubious.

"Why should I?"

"Well, he's older, he's taller, he's got that bad boy vibe going that I know from personal experience works like a charm, and he's a bit of a jerk, which for some reason also works. Ask Artie," Puck listed. "Also he never gives up. You know what that means?"

"What does it mean?" Blaine asked with pretend curiosity. Puck ignored his sarcasm.

"It means that he doesn't take 'no' for an answer. It means that he likes a challenge. It means it's not going to be easy, and he'll love every minute of it."

"I think Kurt can handle it," Blaine said with a knowing smile.

"Then I don't think he knows what he's getting himself into. Every time he tries to ignore Jared, or throw some kind of bitchy retort at him, or push him away, it's only going to encourage him to try harder, until Kurt eventually gives up and gives in."

"Yeah, sure, because that's typical Kurt," Blaine said sarcastically. "Do you know Kurt?"

"Do you know Jared?" Puck countered very seriously.

Blaine sighed. "Well, in any case, that was yesterday. Surely he's got other stuff to do. It's not like he'll be coming back just for hitting on a high school kid, right?"

"Hey, jockstrap."

Puck winced involuntarily at the sound of Jared's voice. The aforementioned dreadlocked young man appeared at Puck's shoulder, smiling like a washed up rocker on a high.

"No, not really. You see, he's like a fungus; useless and disgusting and hard to get rid off without a lot of deadly chemicals," Puck said, ignoring him. Blaine stared between Puck and Jared, perplexed.

"What are you guys talking about?" Jared asked.

"You," Puck said immediately.

"Nothing in particular," Blaine said pleasantly. Jared seemed notice him just then; he greeted him by ruffling his perfectly gelled hair a little in a very patronizing manner.

"Hey, little fellow. Where's your friend Kurt?" he asked. If Blaine was the least bit irritated by this, he did a very good job of hiding it. He simply ran a quick hand over his hair to fix it.

"Uh, he hasn't arrived yet. And actually, he's my boyfriend," he said in a very polite voice. Puck watched with interest; Blaine might have struck him as a bit prim at first, but now he just thought he was very classy.

Jared gave a low whistle, as he reached for something inside Blaine's locker. Puck saw it was a strip of photos that had been taped inside; there were four black and white tiny pictures of Blaine and Kurt smiling and making faces at the camera, and one of Kurt giving Blaine a kiss on the cheek. They probably had them taken in one of the photo-booths at the mall.

"Well, aren't you lucky, you got yourself a looker," Jared said, handing the pictures back to Blaine. "You hang on tight, you don't find many like that here in Lima," he added, making a clicking sound with his tongue as he winked and pointed an index at Blaine, like a cheesy suave guy in a movie, as he walked backwards and away. Puck was tempted to bang his head against the lockers.

"Now you're gonna tell me that you're not a little worried that _thing_ is going after your boyfriend?" he asked. Unexpectedly, Blaine burst out laughing.

"I'm sorry, he taught you _everything you know_? Does that mean that you genuinely go around with lines like that trying to pick up women?"

Puck glared at him, hoping his no-longer-perfectly-styled hair would catch on fire, and started walking away. Blaine closed his locker and followed. "I'm so glad we have Biology together, because I really want to hear all about when you learned to wink like that, it must have been a really proud moment," Blaine joked, walking safely a few steps behind Puck to avoid possibly swinging fists.

* * *

><p>During Biology, Puck had made an effort to forget the whole thing. Maybe Blaine was right, maybe they really didn't have to worry. After all, Kurt was not that kind of guy, and maybe Jared would get bored soon and leave them alone.<p>

So, as he ignored Blaine still teasing him about his time as a padawan in the art of seducing cougars -seriously, _padawan_, how much more of a nerd could Blaine be?- he went out to the hallway, with Blaine still in tow, laughing.

The scene that met their eyes was worthy of a Backstreet Boys's video, or maybe High School Musical.

Jared had gotten his hands on an acoustic guitar, and was now singing and dancing around Kurt as the mortified boy tried to make his way toward his locker. It was particularly hard to navigate the crowd of students when there was a nutjob prancing around you trying to get your attention. Nearby, Brittany and Santana were bending over with laughter, while Sam and Finn exchanged looks of confusion and horror. Students stopped and gawked or laughed; a few hockey guys watched disapprovingly.

Puck couldn't make out the song, but by the few lyrics he caught, he knew it was rather PG-13. He almost felt the need to apologize to Blaine.

Even Mercedes and Rachel got a little frightened and dragged Kurt away before he could even finish getting his books, and Jared finally stopped playing. Some of the passer-byes clapped and hooted, and Jared gave an over-the-top bow. The hockey guys grinned evilly at him.

"You know, I kinda hope he gets his ass kicked by the hockey jerks. That would teach him," Puck suddenly said. Blaine sighed and laughed.

"Look, Noah, you might be making a big deal out of it," he said, heading toward his next class. "I'll admit, we're not exactly used to getting male attention. I speak for myself in this as well," Blaine continued. "I mean, it's Lima, and we don't have a lot of openly gay or bisexual guys flirting with us all the time, so maybe we don't know how to handle it, or know if boundaries are being crossed or whatever. I'm sure Kurt doesn't actually enjoy being serenaded like that by a stranger, and in McKinley of all places, but I understand why he wouldn't know what to do about it."

"Okay, I understand," Puck started, "but then what's wrong with telling Kurt that Jared is being inappropriate and that he should tell him to back off? We're just helping him."

Blaine pursed his lips, trying to keep a straight face.

"What is so damn funny?" Puck demanded. Blaine shook his head.

"Nothing... well, except the fact that it _is_ a bit funny, coming from you. No offense."

"None taken," Puck replied through gritted teeth. Blaine chuckled.

"It's just... _you_, Noah Puckerman, self-proclaimed man-whore, who used to toss Kurt into dumpsters, are now trying to keep him safe from potential sexual predators, who are, by the way, related to you? You have to admit, it's a little funny."

"Hilarious," Puck said flatly. "Don't come crying to me when your boyfriend cheats on you with my sleazy cousin."

Blaine snorted. "He's not gonna cheat on me."

"Yeah, keep telling yourself that," Puck said before he walked off.

* * *

><p>On his way to History, Puck spotted Kurt at his locker, and the tall dreadlocked boy leaning on the locker next to him, talking in a low voice. He could guess what Jared might be saying, judging by the leer on his face, and the way Kurt glared at him every now and then as if he were a bug.<p>

Puck stood nearby, straining to hear, concealed behind Tina's open locker door. She blinked, puzzled, as he stood right next to her but didn't really seem to notice her there.

"What are you doing?" she asked curiously.

"Spy work," he replied without looking at her. Tina followed his gaze and smiled amusedly.

"You're spying on your cousin or on Kurt?"

"Shh!"

"What?"

"I can't hear what they're saying."

"You're not gonna hear anything from all the way over here."

"Okay, not hear, I'm trying to read lips."

"And why?"

"Can't tell you."

"Why not?"

"It's a long story. Did it look like he just said 'phone' or 'bone'?"

"I'm really confused right now."

"Shh!"

"What?"

"You're gonna blow our cover."

"_Our_ cover?" Tina looked at Puck like he had lost it, and slammed her locker loudly, grinning mischievously as she did. Puck jumped, and Jared looked over and saw him.

"Oh hey Noah!" he waved. Puck grumbled and glared at Tina.

"What's got you so worked up?" she asked.

Puck wasn't looking at her, because Jared was trying to put a hand on Kurt's waist and Kurt was slapping it away, and that was distracting enough.

"Not 'what', but rather 'who'," he said. "Hey, you have French with Kurt, right?"

"Yeah."

"Go now, please."

Tina shook her head at him in confusion, but complied nonetheless. She approached Kurt, who looked utterly relieved by her presence, as he immediately latched onto her arm and led her away quickly.

Jared, however, didn't get the hint, and started going after them. Puck wasn't having it.

"Whoa, what?" Jared exclaimed when Puck jumped in front of him and stood there like a wall.

"Why are you doing this?" Puck demanded.

"Doing what?" Jared faked confusion.

"Kurt."

"I'm not doing Kurt." Mischievous grin. "Yet."

"You asshole. He's got a boyfriend," Puck said, giving him a slight shove. Jared slapped his hand away.

"What's it to you? It's not like he's _your_ boyfriend."

"Well, he's my friend, and Blaine is my friend."

"Is Finn your friend too?"

Puck cocked an eyebrow. What did that have to do with anything? "What the- Yeah."

"And is that why you slept with his then-girlfriend and had a baby with her?"

That hurt a little. How did Jared know all of this, anyway? Puck glared.

"Look, don't do this. Just leave him alone. Look for someone else," he said, and he was a little embarrassed by the slight urgency in his tone.

"There aren't that many options here in Lima," Jared shrugged.

"If you're bi, don't you like girls too? Go for a girl," Puck offered. Jared tapped his chin thoughtfully.

"All right," he said casually. "I like that big girl, Lauren. She's hot. I like a girl with curves."

Puck's blood boiled, but his head felt oddly cold. "I'll murder you," he growled under his breath.

Jared did his stupid little shrug again. "Then sorry, no one else strikes my fancy right now. If I've got a shot with Kurt, I'm going for it."

Puck snorted. "Well, good luck. He's not gonna go for it."

Jared smirked as he straightened up. "Well, as you know, I can be very persuasive," he said in a low voice, walking around Puck and heading in the direction that Kurt and Tina went.

Puck hesitated for a moment, because he was supposed to go to History, but he thought he'd better follow his cousin. If Jared was really going for it, full-mode, then this was going to be either disastrous or very embarrassing or both.

Actually, if Kurt finally told him to get lost, then Puck kinda wanted to see. He wanted to see Jared's skin crawl at being publicly shot down. History could wait; this he had to see.

"Wow, you're a bigger loser than I thought," Puck taunted, catching up with Jared. "You don't have anything better to do than to hang around here trying to get laid when you most likely are gonna get kicked to the curb."

The tall dreadlocked boy glanced back at Puck with that smirk still on his face, and Puck didn't know what to make of it. He had a bad feeling about this.

Jared strode into the French classroom, and spotted Kurt, and before Puck could stop him, he made a beeline toward him. Kurt didn't see him approaching, as his head was bent over his desk, eyes on an open notebook, scribbling elegantly away on the page. Jared sat on the chair of the desk in front, with his chest to the backrest, and leaned toward Kurt.

"Has anyone ever told you," he started, with a not-so-discreet purr in his voice, and a not-so-discreet leer on his face, "that your skin looks like white chocolate?"

Kurt didn't look up, but his hand stopped writing, and he seemed to be momentarily thrown off by the comment, but soon enough he resumed his task, as if nothing had happened. In fact, the pen seemed to be scratching the page more furiously.

Puck rolled his eyes so hard it almost hurt, and stood beside Jared, who ignored him.

"I wonder if it tastes like it too," he added.

Kurt's hand gave a lurch, and his pen scrawled an ugly ink line across the page. Jared smiled, satisfied, and licked his lips purposely.

"I'd like to find out," he said.

Beside Kurt, Tina made a choked noise and covered her mouth with her hand. Finn's eyes went as wide as plates, and he seemed to be trying to formulate words. Behind them, Santana and Mercedes were shaking with restrained laughter. Across the aisle, Rory Flanagan's jaw practically hit the desk.

_Say something, Kurt. Tell him to fuck off,_ Puck thought.

Kurt's eyes met Jared's, and he chuckled.

"You should be a poet," he said cuttingly, and went back to writing . Not exactly Kurt's best retort, but it was something. However, an unfazed Jared reached for Kurt's hand and stilled it over the paper. Kurt froze.

"JaredcanItalktoyououtside?" Puck blurted out, a little unintelligibly, without expecting a reply, and yanked Jared by the back of his shirt, practically dragging him out of the classroom, and nearly tripping Mrs. Brown, the French teacher, who was just walking in. Puck all but tossed Jared out into the hallway and threw up his hands in frustration.

"Whoa, chill out, Noah!" Jared exclaimed as Puck finally let go of him.

"Look, please stop," Puck continued, trying to keep his voice down. "You're not only making a complete ass of yourself, but you're playing with fire here. And I'm begging you to stop."

"Why are you so worked up over this? I'm just flirting. Jeez..." Jared retorted. Puck ignored a persistent urge to smack him.

"Listen, you're obviously unaware of this, so I'm letting you know: this school is kinda full of assholes who hate gays and bisexuals, and I'm guessing they're not too amused with the public displays of excitation you've been making -argh, excuse me, I think I threw up a little in my mouth-, so not only are you gonna get in trouble with the assholes, but you're gonna get _Kurt_ in trouble with them. Do you want that?" He sighed. "Come on, he's already had a bad enough time in this stupid school. He still does. If you really like him all that much, would you really do that to him?"

There was a beat, during which Puck got a flicker of hope that anything he just said might have gotten through Jared's thick noggin. Jared, however, just shrugged, like always.

"Who said anything about liking? I just want to have sex," was Jared's reply.

Puck shut his eyes and tilted his head up. "Lord, give me patience."

"And it's not like I want to have sex in the school with all the homophobic assholes around. Although school sex is always really hot," Jared continued, unprompted. Puck scrunched his nose.

"Lord, _please_ give me patience."

When he opened his eyes a second later, Jared had snuck back into the French classroom quietly. Outraged, Puck had to watched in disbelief as Jared tried to coax Rory into giving him his seat, while the poor boy tried to stand his ground, Kurt pretended this had nothing to do with him, Santana was almost all the way under her desk in a fit of giggles, and the teacher droned obliviously on in front.

Puck thought about barging in and telling Mrs. Brown that there was an intruder in her classroom, so that she'd kick Jared out for good. But that would've been too embarrassing. What had become of his badassness, seriously? Resignated, he headed toward History, already late, and really irritated.

* * *

><p>"I need your help," Puck said, later that day.<p>

Quinn looked up from her locker. "With what?"

"With Jared."

"What about him?"

"He's hitting on Kurt."

Quinn chuckled. "Oh, really? I didn't notice," she said sarcastically.

"I need you to help me stop him."

"Why?" Quinn frowned in confusion.

"Because it's horrible and embarrassing."

"Because he's gay?"

Puck sighed. "No. And he's not gay. Apparently he's bi."

"And that's bad?" she looked at him curiously.

"I haven't said that, geez..."

"Then what's wrong?"

"Don't you get it? He's trying to get into his pants. Oh god, I can't believe I just said that. This is too weird," Puck looked around, like he was looking for an escape route.

"What's the big deal?" Quinn snickered. Puck took a deep breath.

"You of all people would know that guys like Jared are the worst. He's a slut and a pig. He's a slut pig."

"He also smells like one and says 'whoa' a lot. I'm familiar with him."

"And because of that you should know that he's a worthless idiot. Remember how I was with you at the beginning? All the things I did to you, he's now trying to do it to Kurt!"

"He's trying to get Kurt pregnant?"

Puck looked frustrated and angry. "He's not- I did not _try_ to get you preg- you know what? Forget it. I thought you'd want to help Kurt."

"I think Kurt can take care of himself," Quinn said. Puck rolled his eyes.

"Why do people keep saying that when it's obvious he doesn't even know how to tell a guy to get lost?"

"Look, you're acting weird," she shook her head in disbelief. "Has it occurred to you that maybe Kurt likes the attention?"

"He looks like he wants to die. Besides, why would he want attention from Jared? Why would _anyone_ want any attention from Jared? He's a douche."

Quinn shut her locker and turned to Puck with an annoyed look. "Kurt will be fine. You have to relax. He's a smart guy, and you're not his daddy."

Puck was about to say something else, but remained quiet, suddenly looking a little lost. Seeing as Quinn was not in the mood to pay any attention to him, he shuffled away dejectedly.

* * *

><p>He must have been noticeably irked that day, because everyone either asked him about it or got out of his way. It felt oddly like the old days at McKinley, but Puck didn't feel high and mighty. He was just angry at Jared <em>and<em> Kurt. Because Jared _still_ hadn't left, because Kurt _still_ hadn't told him to beat it.

To be fair, even if Kurt did say something, Jared still probably wouldn't leave him alone.

And it's not like Kurt didn't keep hinting at it, but there was only so much he could do. There was no way of predicting when and where Jared would appear. It was a horrible habit of his.

Like in the cafeteria, Kurt only had a second to squeeze between Finn and Rachel at the table, just so Jared couldn't sit next to him. But he kept acting like nothing was going on, like there wasn't a weird dude stalking him. And Jared kept acting like it was no big deal to stalk Kurt. Puck entertained the idea of running him over with Artie's wheelchair.

"You can't tell me you're not a _little_ _tiny bit_ jealous. I mean, there's nothing wrong with that. A little jealousy never hurt anyone; it's normal. He's your boyfriend. It's got to bother you some that another guy is trying to get his attention."

"No, because I trust Kurt," Blaine said flatly, not even glancing at Puck as they walked toward Glee.

"Yeah, but you _don't know_ if you can trust Jared."

"Okay, we've been over this," Blaine said, finally turning toward him.

Puck looked confused. "We have?"

"Not you and me," Blaine snorted. "I don't know if you know, but a few months ago, when I went back to Dalton to visit the Warblers, one of the new members, Sebastian, started... hitting on me," he said, and the faintest blush appeared on his cheeks. "Now, I didn't care, but it bothered Kurt. Because, granted, the guy got a little persistent. But I showed Kurt that he had nothing to worry about and that he could trust me." He took a deep breath. "So, I can't act like I'm jealous now, he's going to think that I don't trust him."

"A-ha! So you admit you're feeling jealous," Puck pointed an accusing finger at him. Blaine sighed.

"I may be a tad... annoyed."

"I knew it!" the mohawked boy exclaimed triumphantly.

"Cut it out, Noah, it's not a big deal," Blaine retorted. "As I said, I trust Kurt."

"Yeah, but like _I _said, you can't trust Jared," Puck said smugly.

As they walked into the choir room, Puck's shoulders slumped. Yet again, Jared was _still_ there, sitting really close to Kurt. In fact, he was almost leaning his chin on Kurt's shoulder, and he seemed to be sniffing him. Kurt looked like he might like to set him on fire. Santana couldn't even dissimulate her insane chortling anymore.

Blaine strode forward without a hitch. Kurt's face immediately lit up, only to turn bright red right away when Blaine barely even let him say 'hello' before cupping his face and kissing him long and hard.

Puck's eyebrows shot up, both surprised and impressed. Kurt and Blaine barely had any PDA in school, for fear of the McKinley homophobes. But this meant that at least Blaine listened to him a little.

Unfortunately, it didn't seem to have any effect on Jared.

Finn promptly cleared his through loudly, and Santana and Brittany exchanged glances.

"Okay, knock it off, guys," Mr. Schue said, appearing suddenly. He tugged at Blaine's shirt to pull him back. "It's time to focus on the task at hand."

"Boning Kurt, apparently?" Santana muttered. Kurt flushed ever more, and Mike snorted.

"Regionals," Mr. Schue glared at her.

Puck sat behind Blaine and gave him a gentle pat on the shoulder.

"I don't want to hear it," Blaine said, sounding more embarrassed than satisfied. Puck shrugged.

"Hey, it's cool. You gotta do what you gotta do," he whispered back.

"Shut up."

"That was pretty fierce. It was like watching the Discovery Channel."

"Leave me alone."

* * *

><p>"Just go ahead, I'll meet you outside. I'm gonna drop something off at my locker," Blaine said to Kurt.<p>

School was dismissed for the day, and as New Directions blended in with the rest of the student body, Puck noticed that once again Jared had magically disappeared, which made him nervous.

"I know you think that probably did the trick, but I doubt it," Puck told Blaine, as Blaine spun the combination of his locker.

"What?" Blaine asked.

"That smooch you gave your boyfriend? That wasn't enough. A restraining order might be, though."

Blaine chuckled. "Okay, now I know you're exaggerating. Certainly we wouldn't have to go that far."

"Let me ask you something: whatever happened to that Sebastian guy you mentioned? Did he give up?" Puck asked, narrowing his eyes curiously. Blaine looked hesitant for a moment.

"Uh, no. He's... still around," he admitted dejectedly. Puck gave him a knowing look.

"Okay, fine, I see your point," Blaine said. "For the record, I think you're still exaggerating. I mean, for all his forwardness, Sebastian has never crossed any boundaries."

"He's in Dalton, what do you expect? We're talking about my slut of a cousin here. He will defile your boyfriend without thinking twice about it. It's all part of his strategy."

As much as Puck expected Blaine to look a little more alarmed, at least he looked a little revolted. But he also gave Puck a curious smile.

"What?" Puck asked.

"Sorry, it's just that... I still don't get how you're so concerned. I mean, I appreciate it and all, but... you barely ever talk to me, I didn't even think you remembered my name."

Puck rolled his eyes. "I told you, I hate that my cousin is such an unapologetic slut, and I would feel terrible if he broke you guys up. And we already lost Kurt once."

Blaine's smile grew, both amused and a little touched.

"No offense, but Jared is definitively not Kurt's type," he said. "And besides, it's just harmless flirting. A little in-your-face, admittedly, but harmless nonetheless."

Puck kept his retort to himself. Obviously Blaine was too dense to understand how Jared worked. Granted, Puck wasn't exactly sure if it was the same when it came to hooking up with guys, but how different could it be? And Jared seemed extremely confident: and that annoyed Puck even more.

They stepped out into the courtyard, just in time to see Jared reappear at the bottom of the steps, near Kurt, who was obliviously chatting with Quinn and Rory. The lanky boy wrapped an arm around his shoulders without invitation.

Puck and Blaine glanced worriedly at each other, but neither moved. For Puck's part, he kind of wanted to see if Jared would dare to be so bold, right in the middle of a crowded courtyard.

Whatever it was that Jared whispered into Kurt's ear, it was loud enough for Quinn and Rory to hear and be shocked. Kurt turn bright red. Blaine started down the steps slowly, and Puck followed.

"Okay, I didn't want to say anything because you're Noah's cousin, and I'm sure you're a nice guy deep down. Deep deep _deep_ down," they heard Kurt say, pushing Jared's arm off his shoulder with a hint of disgust on his face. "I'm _somewhat_ flattered by all your attention, but to be honest, you're starting to make me really uncomfortable, and I would like you to stop."

Puck smirked. Typical Kurt, always too wordy and polite. But maybe Quinn was right, maybe he could take care of himself after all.

"Aw, you know you like it," Jared said, reaching up to play with Kurt's shirt collar.

"No, I don't, and please don't touch me like that," Kurt all but swatted the hand away.

"Feisty, I like that," Jared purred. Quinn and Rory watched the exchange like a tennis match, eyes wide and mouth slightly agape.

Kurt gritted his teeth. "_No_, not feisty. I'm really starting to get annoyed."

Jared's eyes flickered up, spotting Blaine and Puck. "Is your boyfriend going to come and kick my ass?" he asked playfully.

"I don't need him to kick your ass. I can actually do it myself," Kurt spat.

"Then why haven't you?"

"Because I hoped I wouldn't have to, and that's why I'm warning you to stop before I-"

Before Kurt could finish his sentence, Jared wrapped his arms around his waist, pulling him flush against his body, and kissed him, very hard, very audibly and way too long.

"Shit," Blaine exclaimed as he shot down the steps, with Puck in tow, as Kurt visibly struggled to get out of Jared's grip. The lanky boy proved to be a lot stronger than he looked. Kurt managed to push him away, staggering backward against Rory, as Blaine reached them and shoved Jared as hard as he could. But it did nothing to erase the cocky satisfied look on the dreadlocked boy's face as he licked his lips and watched Kurt with amusement.

Puck watched Kurt too. He looked a little paler, and he instinctively wiped his lips with the back of his hand, looking horrified. He seemed to be shaking.

"What the hell is your problem?" Blaine shouted, getting in Jared's face. Everyone in the courtyard was suddenly watching. Puck cringed.

Jared was snickering, holding up his hands defensively. "Whoa, chill, little fellow. I'm sorry, I just couldn't resist."

"SCREW YOU!"

Usually well-put-together Kurt shot around Blaine and delivered a fist to Jared's jaw. Puck and Blaine had to pull him back, Kurt kicking and squirming and delivering an uncharacteristic string of curses.

Jared nursed his jaw, still smiling smugly. "You know you want more," he said.

Kurt made to attack Jared again, but Puck beat him to it. He drew his fist at his own cousin's face, and knocked him clean off his feet.

"Sorry, couldn't resist," he said mockingly.

Everyone kind of stared, and Puck got distracted by the fact that all pairs of eyes in the courtyard seemed to be trained on him all of a sudden. He didn't see it coming when Jared used his legs to tackle Puck to the ground, and they proceeded to wrestle on the floor, while everyone around gasped and stared in shock.

"FIGHT!" shouted Azimio.

It became a full-blown brawl, with Blaine joining in and getting in a few good punches too, and people around them chanting. Kurt managed to pull Blaine out of it. Jacob Ben Israel was in the periphery, recording everything with his video-camera. The Glee kids were all shouting at them, some begging them to stop, other egging them on. Even Lauren Zizes was somewhere in the back, watching rather impassively, but there might have been a little smirk of pride twitching at the corner of her lips.

Puck and Jared kept going at it, doing a real number on each other, until Coach Sylvester, Coach Beiste and Mr. Schue intervened. It took Finn, Sam and Mike to break the two apart, but not before Jared managed to sneak one last jab, and Puck was out like a light.

* * *

><p>Puck opened his eyes and winced. He was surprised to find himself in the infirmary, lying down on one of those hard, too-short beds. There was drying blood on his split lip, and it tasted like copper.<p>

"Hey."

Puck lifted his head slowly; Kurt sat beside the bed, looking guilty, worried, but also a little relieved.

"What are you doing here?" Puck asked groggily. Kurt fidgeted.

"Uh, Blaine got an elbow to the cheek. The nurse made him put some ice on it and lay down for a bit."

Puck glanced at the bed next to his, but it was empty.

"He's fine. He's at Figgins's office," Kurt continued. "I came back to make sure you were okay. I don't think I've ever seen Puckzilla go down like that."

Puck chuckled. "You didn't have to."

Kurt shrugged. "Well, you didn't have to get into a major fight with your cousin, either."

"Maybe you're right. So... what happened?"

"Uh, he knocked you out just before we could break you two up," Kurt grimaced. "He's pretty strong."

"I know. It pisses me off," Puck said. "Where _is_ Jared?"

Kurt shrugged again. "I don't know. He snuck away before anyone could grab him."

"Yeah, he does that," Puck groaned. "Did you get in trouble?"

Kurt shook his head. "Figgins wanted to give me detention. I told him what Jared did, and why I had a right to punch him. Quinn and Rory backed me up. He let me go with a warning."

Puck sat up slowly and gave Kurt an appreciative glance. "I didn't know you could punch like that."

Kurt chuckled. He glanced at the entrance. "Blaine's trying to appeal to Figgins right now. For both you and him. I already tried, but... he's not exactly fond of you."

"I'll probably get a week of detention, or maybe worse."

"Yeah, probably. I wish I could change his mind, tho."

"Nah, it's okay."

It felt a little strange to talk to Kurt like this, to hold a normal conversation. But it was nice.

"Why did you do it?"

Puck leaned back against the pillow. "I don't really want to talk about it," he said simply.

"I just... wondered," Kurt said, a little deflated.

Blaine walked in just then, tiptoeing carefully.

"I got one day of detention," he whispered to Kurt, pulling the curtains closed again. "I explained that I was defending your honor, but he still thinks I shouldn't have gotten involved in the fight." He suddenly took notice of Puck. "Oh, you're awake."

"I'm okay," Puck waved his hand dismissively.

"Sorry you got dragged into it," Blaine replied. Puck shook his head.

"It's okay. I think I brought this on myself. I should know better than to let Jared roam free. He needs to be locked up in his own basement or something."

The nurse poked her head in through the curtains.

"If you're well enough now, the principal wants to see you in his office," she stated, then disappeared again. Puck blew a long gust of air. He had a feeling it would be worse than he imagined.

"Is this why you were so worried about Kurt? You knew Jared would do something like that?" Blaine asked after a pause. Puck sat up again, rolling his eyes.

"It's what I've been trying to tell you. He _always_ does stuff like this. I should know, he taught me!"

Kurt raised his eyebrows. "You were worried about me?"

Puck sighed. "Not worried, exactly..." he started. "It's just... Jared's an asshole, and I wanted to put him in his place. Don't make a big deal out of it."

"You were the one making a big deal out of it," Blaine said with a curious smile. "You actually warned me that Kurt might actually go for that guy."

"What?" Kurt looked suddenly horrified.

"Well, sorry, but why did you act like you liked it?" Puck demanded.

Kurt looked at each of them in turn, staring back at him intently, and turned red.

"I didn't like it... but I didn't know what to do. He wasn't exactly being inappropriate... until now."

Puck snorted. "I see what you mean, Anderson."

Kurt frowned in annoyance. "_I didn't, seriously_! Did you think I wanted _him_ to kiss me like that, and in front of the whole school? That was horrifying and embarrassing and disgusting. If I had known he was going to do that, I would've punched him sooner."

"Well, I didn't think you'd punch him, but I kinda thought you would've pepper-sprayed him or something from the get go," Puck replied. "Cuz he made it pretty clear what he wanted to do to you, and it's a whole lot more than I needed to know."

Kurt gave him a funny look. "Who exactly were you worried about? Me or Jared?"

Puck seemed a little at a loss, so he pointed at Blaine. "_He_ was freaking out too!"

"I never freaked out," Blaine retorted. "I trust Kurt. He wouldn't go for that over-the-top bad boy act."

"Yeah, no offense, Puck, but that's just not my thing," Kurt shook his head. "Seriously, why did you react like that? You didn't exactly have to start a brawl."

"You lost your cool, too. If I hadn't stopped you -which maybe I shouldn't have-, you would've ended up in worse trouble for doing a number on someone."

Kurt bit his lip. He glanced at Blaine for a second and took a deep breath.

"Well, not that it's any of your business, but... this is isn't the first time that I've been kissed against my will, by someone I dislike," he said, unfazed, "and it's very unpleasant, to say the least."

That was all he seemed willing to share about that. Puck stared at him, a little surprised. He had no idea what Kurt might be talking about, but he suddenly felt really bad for him.

He then noticed how they were both staring at him expectantly. Puck's shoulders slumped defeatedly, and he sighed.

"Fine. I was... don't take this the wrong way, but... I was kind of thinking of... Beth."

Kurt raised an eyebrow and made a face. "_Beth_? You're comparing me to your baby daughter?"

"It's... it has to do with something Quinn said, which kinda made me realize-"

"You're comparing me to your _baby daughter_," Kurt said again, this time like a statement.

"Listen," Puck held up his hands defensively. He took a deep breath. "I've... I am now sorry for all the stuff that I did to you, you know, slushies and dumpster tosses. And I guess I never really apologized, either. I was a jerk back then." He bit his lip, forgetting momentarily that it was wounded. "When you transferred to Dalton, I felt bad. Because you turned out to be not as bad as I thought you were, and I kinda liked you, and we were all a team, and I could've helped to keep you safe here in McKinley, and I didn't. It kind of reminded me how I failed to convince Quinn to keep Beth, to let us be a family."

He looked up briefly; Kurt was watching Puck attentively, and Blaine was looking at Kurt.

Puck cleared his throat to continue. "But when you guys started going out... I don't know, maybe it had something to do with me and Zizes hooking up, but it felt right. Being in a solid relationship felt right. And after all the crap you went through here, I really thought you deserved to be happy." He ignored Blaine's cheesy smile. "And I thought of Beth again, of how I want her to grow up and have all of these things. I want _that_ for her. I want her to find someone that will make her happy."

He sighed loudly again. "So seeing Jared hitting on you without any shame at all, it kind of reminded me of who I used to be, who I was to Quinn, this person that I don't really want to be ever again. And the kind of person that I wouldn't want anywhere near Beth. So I got worried. Because if _you_ could cave for a guy like that, then that meant that maybe Beth could, too."

There was a long pause, both boys staring at him in shock and Puck suddenly regretted everything he just said. Maybe he had changed a lot, but the Puckasaurus was _never ever_ so open about his feelings, because it always led to trouble. What if Kurt and Blaine told everyone what he just told them?

"Wow..." Kurt muttered, finally breaking the silence. His eyes shifted incessantly, as if he were trying to find something to say. Puck kicked his feet against the legs of the bed.

"I know it's ridiculous, but..." he said, suddenly very embarrassed. "I'm sorry I overreacted. The last thing I wanted was to put on a show and draw too much attention to what was happening. I wish there had been an easier way to get rid of him."

"Puck, I... I don't know what to say," Kurt was shaking his head.

"Just don't tell Quinn," Puck said quickly.

"No, don't worry," Kurt replied. Blaine pretended to zip up his mouth, but Puck got the feeling he was trying to hide his amused smile.

Kurt too was trying not to smile, while Puck contemplated going to Figgins's office and getting it over with. He really just wanted to go home and forget that he had just gotten into a major brawl to defend the honor of the gay kid he used to tease, because his apparently bisexual cousin had tried to take advantage of him. It was all too weird for him, he was not used to doing this kind of thing, but if he was honest with himself, he felt pretty good about it. He was even a little proud of himself.

He noticed Kurt fidgeting, like still trying to decide what to say. He seemed to settle for a quick pat to Puck's shoulder, and a tight-lipped smile, like he was trying unsuccessfully to hide it.

"Thanks," he said simply, softly. Puck half-grinned in return.

"Don't mention it," he gave a dismissive wave. "Like, ever again. Seriously."

Kurt and Blaine both gave him a thumbs-up and a wink.

"Visiting hours are over," the nurse said, poking her head in again. Puck sighed, watching his two friends head out, glancing back at him before walking out hand in hand.

* * *

><p>Puck pulled up in front of his house later that afternoon, only to find Jared sitting on the steps of the front porch.<p>

"Oh god, not you..." he mumbled tiredly as he got out of the car.

"I was gonna say that," Jared said sourly, even though he seemed to be smiling. Puck shook his head, sneering at him as he approached. Jared looked as bad as Puck had before the nurse took care of him, but it didn't seem to faze him at all. Puck sat down next to him, groaning.

"What are you doing here?"

"I can't let my mom see me like this, she'll ask too many questions."

"Because of you, I got detention," Puck said angrily. "How did you even get away?"

"I had to knock over a kid with a video camera, and I was free," Jared said.

"Oh good," Puck said, relieved. At least the footage might not show up in Jacob Ben Israel's blog.

"Those female coaches looked a little scary, I didn't plan on sticking around to find out what they might do to me," Jared continued. "Too bad I didn't get to say goodbye to Kurt," he added with a smirk.

Puck rolled his eyes at him, and Jared chuckled.

"He's got a mean right hook," he said, rubbing his sore jaw.

"Serves you right, you moron."

There was a silence between them, and Puck tried to think back to a time when he didn't find Jared so completely detestable. Back when Puck actually looked up to him a little, like the big brother he never had. Oh how things had changed.

"So, are you okay?" he asked hesitantly.

"I'm fine. But I guess I just totally made a fool of myself."

"I'm glad I don't have to point that out to you."

"You kind of did, with your fist," Jared said. "Out of all the people I've fought, I never thought I'd fight you." Puck shook his head and laughed softly, mirthlessly.

"I'm sorry, but at the same time I'm not sorry at all."

"Well, if you hadn't, I'm sure he would've kicked me in the balls. Or his boyfriend would have."

"Why did you have to do it?" Puck inquired.

Jared shrugged, like he always did. "I couldn't resist. You know how I enjoy a challenge."

Puck sighed. "You're an idiot."

"And you're a better person than me. When did you become such a good boy?"

Puck glared at him, but this time, Jared said it without the stinging teasing tone.

Jared sighed. "Anyway I really didn't think Kurt would go for it, but I'd never give up so easily."

Puck narrowed his eyes. _Manwhore_, he thought.

"So does this mean you're gonna stop hanging around here and embarrassing me?" he asked.

Jared smirked. "No guarantees. I'm still expected to find a job, so I have a lot of free time. But," he stood up with a hiss, "I think I'll go away for a while and nurse my wounded ego elsewhere."

"Good," Puck said, watching as Jared started on his way. His cousin turned back and winked.

"You're a good friend, you know? They're lucky to have you," he said. Puck watched him leave.

"Damn right I am," he muttered to himself, smiling self-confidently.

* * *

><p><em>So I conceived this fic before "The first time", and before finding out just how much like Santana this Sebastian character would turn out. To be honest, I like the character, but he doesn't particularly strike me as a male-version of Santana at all. He's just too sweet-looking and sweet-sounding. On the other hand, I think Sam Larsen, with his intense stare and bad-boy look, would be a much more fitting match for Santana. I think he could pull off that slutty attitude much better than sweet, goofy Grant Gustin did. It's not that I don't enjoy watching Grant. But I can't wait to see what they make of Sam Larsen. <em>

_And I swear that the whole "white chocolate" thing came to me way before the Sectionals episode, as well as the rumor that Kurt punches someone. And now it's all I can think of._

_And I just had to use Jim Cantiello's "slut pig" thing. I just HAD to. It's too funny._

_Thanks for reading._

_-Vale_


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